Living on the cheap.

So I make approximately $2,000 per month. I work part-time. Originally it was by choice however now it's more due to lack of better employment in my field in my town.

My reality is that 40% of my monthly income goes to rent; 30% to minimum payments towards debt; and then I still have car insurance, gas, health insurance, phone, food, clothing and recreation to pay for.  The amount left for food, clothing and recreation is a whopping 12%.

So how do I do it?  I have a few tricks.  First one being "Bread Days" many of the bakeries around town donate their day old bread to the community centres.  I know of a few places (almost one for each day of the week) where I can get a free loaf of bread and sometimes buns.  Second big one is the Good Food Box - produce on the cheap.  I've learned that this program is also in other places in BC and beyond.  That means I still need to fill my meat & protein as well as my dairy categories to obtain food from the four food groups (as well as supplement the other groups).

But that still leaves clothing and recreation.  Well, lets tackle recreation first.  I have a toddler, he likes the park, I like the beach, sometimes we go to the park and sometimes we go to the beach and sometimes we just stay home and play.  On rainy days I first check VictoriaStroller.ca to see if there are any free or cheap activities going on and other times we go to the mall and B runs around.  

I also am lucky enough to live in Victoria which offers the Regional Rec Pass (get it while you can it may only be a 2010 offer).  For about $40/month I have drop in access to all the rec centres in the Greater Victoria area.  B and I often going swimming.  I will soon brave the ice for some skating (it's been at least 10 years since the last time I went skating).

As for clothing, well much of B's clothing has come from Victoria Freecycle which is a Yahoo! Group.  I watch it like a hawk to try and get clothes for B.  So far we've been well taken care of.  We also use cloth diapers which is cheaper than disposables.  However we are venturing into potty training.  Training pants are not cheap but the closest dollar store has underwear in his little bum size two pairs for $1.25!  Now if only he'd sit on the potty....

As for myself, so far I've not needed any clothes since hitting these super tight times about 8 months ago.  However I have always been a thrifty shopper.  I also am able to sew, knit & crochet which comes in handy.  My friend Katy has also got me back into recycling clothes into new things - pants to skirts, t-shirts to skirts.  I've even turned some of B's onesies into t-shirts because he's tall and skinny making a 18 month old onesie too short to be done up but a great t-shirt!

The hard part though is the unexpected expenses which ALWAYS seem to come up.  To survive those it becomes a challenge of taking in returnables for deposits, selling off stuff no longer needed or heading to the food bank to free up grocery money.

So that's my start on shedding my financial fumblings with the world in hopes that my tricks may help others find more money in their pocket.

If you don't have anything nice to say...

Recently I joined a parenting group at my church.  We meet once a week while B is enjoying the mid-week kid's program rather than all the parents leaving only to come back an hour and a half later to pick up their kid.  We discuss pressing issues with raising children and offer support to each other at our various stages of life, parenting and faith.

I had mentioned my thinning patience at B's numerous tantrums. One of the suggestions given was to offer B options rather than making demands.  The example given was "Do you want to leave in 10 minutes or 5 minutes" but B isn't that advanced at age 2.  


Instead I tried this - I'd think of two or three activities I was willing to let B partake in and ask, "Do you want to go swimming?"  If he said yes, we would go swimming, if he said no I'd ask about another activity.  Sometimes he would say no to everything and I would then fall back on my "let's do ___" and B would generally follow, even if he previously said no to the activity.  Despite my skepticism it worked.

Then a new problem arose.  An unwanted comment from another parent.  I was asked "who's the parent here?"  What?  I can't let my kid decide whether he wants to stop riding his bike to go swimming?  Makes no difference to me.  It's not like I'm asking whether he wants dinner or not.  There are still restrictions.

Sometimes as parents we need to ask our kids what they really want to do with their play time.  For weeks I had been struggling to get B to participate in his soccer practice.  He'd rather play on the playground or climb the rocks next to the field.  One week we went early.  I told B that he could play until soccer started.  B played on the playground; climbed the rocks and then when he saw his coach he joined her on the soccer field.  I learned that B didn't want to have to choose.  He wanted to do all three activities.  By the end I had one tired but really happy little boy.  All I had to do was give him more time do do it all.

Don't get me wrong.  I put my foot down when I need to.  Nap times. Bed times. Cleaning up messes.  Those are non-negotiable.  But what to do during play time?  Seriously.  That needs to be up to the kid as far as a parent is willing to facilitate.  When I don't want B to ride his bike, it just isn't an option I suggest.  If I don't feel like taking B to the pool I don't suggest swimming.  But asking whether he wants to play cars, puzzles, go for a walk, what harm is there in asking him what he feels like doing?

Whether anyone agrees with me or not, I can say this - my house has been a lot more peaceful since I've given options.  Well, except for those annoying singing toys people buy him...